SWHC Logs : Individual Achievement


The Magic and Mystery of Dan
  • I have a sudden, burning fire in my loins Added September 21, 2001
      * KemloCaesar considers pissing on his keyboard.
      <KemloCaesar> just as a response to you all.
      <Elkman> And that would hurt us... how?
      <zompist> i think, indeed, that fouling your own possessions is the noblest response to ruffianism

  • Hot Toothless Down-Syndrome Kids *Love* Anal Action. Added September 10, 2001
      * KemloCaesar is feeling all weird. Apparently, I'm not emotionally mature enough to be sentenced to three to five years in prison.
      <KemloCaesar> Community service instead
      <CrazyClimber> of course, since in this case "community service" means "blowing the cops," it works out for everyone

  • ass-love means condemnation to the underworld?
      <KemloCaesar> anyone know what it means to gauss, as in to de-gauss your monitor?
      <SoiledGreen> you take a baseball bat to it.
      <raven> and then set it on fire.
      <SoiledGreen> and dance naked around it.
      <Leth> urinatin- oh wait, that's keyboard
      <Darren> well, if gaussing is the opposite of de-gaussing, you just wave big fucking magnets all over the screen until the picture deforms
      <mdxi> you wrap tantalum-neodymium wiring arounf it and then connect the ends to a 3.8957GeV power source
      <SoiledGreen> and throw it in the bathtub and jump in.
      <mdxi> then bombard it with a pure nertron stream for at least 45 seconds

  • a bloated whale corpse is topologically equivalent to a hand grenade
      <KemloCaesar> tie, scooters wouldn't explode.
      <tieboy> YES THANK YOU KEMLO
      <tieboy> see... non-exploding scooters not as fun to talk about as exploding ones
      <tieboy> therefore, pretend scooters explode
      <tieboy> makes more fun talky

  • He gets high on vinegar
      <spinn> it's a shame paul will wind up high on paint thinner fumes and start writing checks to his game boy and flashlights and stuff

The Dodge
      <Dodge> "I'm sorry sir, are you a registered user of the Air Force Personnel Termination System? If not, you'll have to take these forms and have them approved by chain of command, then resubmit them to our office and wait 7-10 working days for approval. At that time, you may terminate the Air Force Personnel you wish to execute. Thank you."

  • "Goose has a paper cut!"
      <spinn> just say a very special tech sergeant is soon gonna find himself a consignment of extra shiny paper clips
      <spinn> by the sound of it, an air force sergeant should be thrilled
      <Thosw> Of course... those are $500 paper clips
      <sol-D> that shine isn't free, you know
      <Dodge> Lord knows we need em, we exhausted our office supply budget for FY 2001 three weeks ago

Ben sol-D / TMR
  • "How to tell your children about TMR's Dong" Added November 12, 2001
      <spinn> q: "dear tmr's dong: I have a neighbor who refuses to reign in his noisy dog. what should I do?"
      <spinn> a: "I am so very, very lonely."

  • sorry, you can't un-blow that schlong
      <sol-D> Most of my creative energies are spent trying to figure out what to do. then I'm left with nothing, and have to go blow my cousin
      <spinn> man is that "innocent sol-d" cover just so whisked away now

jacq Maime, Sweetbus Driver
Drusilla GhostCoder
  • Don't defend me, leper. Added November 7, 2001
      <GhostCoder> Leper? I'm the Handy Man to your tiny avenger!
      <tieboy> ick
      <spinn> man
      <tieboy> get away

Machival Downs
  • Er, I'm not following you Added March 3, 2002
      <Machival> I meant you. okay, here... you said "I got lucky" and I said "also, he was fortunate in that he got the demo." trying to make it so that when you said "I got lucky", you were talking about something else.

Samwise hockeyboi
  • cluck cluck [fweeee] BAWK! clcuck cluck [phllbblbl] buGAWK!
      <KemloCaesar> Why didn't the duck try a grocery store?
      <tieboy> Maybe the guy in the store could have ordered some for him.
      <Agent_Orange> Why would a duck want raisins anyway?
      <Leth> Funny, I didn't think ducks would even like raisins. Raisin BREAD maybe, I guess....
      * Samwise gets the Ass Kicking Machine ready

shoozfloot Kyol
  • There isn't enough marmalade in my immediate vicinity.

      <spinn> people might get confused and not realise it's "trumpet"
      <bablunchich> So its shoes trumpet?
      <spinn> yeah
      <spinn> tho paradoxically she plays the flute
      <spinn> which is why we're calling her shoozfloot
      <spinn> to give her that self-confidence boost so she can admit to the instrument she plays
  • Lawn mower. Rock. Kyol's head. Much bleeding. Added September 18, 2001
      <Kyol> Nah, was walking back to my building from our data center, neighbor was mowing his lawn with a riding mower. I looked and noticed "hey, look, the exhaust side is facing me", a second later there was a "kerthunk" of the rock hitting the blades.
      <agent_orange> then "Ptoo!"
      <agent_orange> Spang!
      <agent_orange> yipe yipe yipe yipe

ristoril mdxi
Raven Spinn
Just About Everyone

Heather Garvey / Raven / raven@xnet.com
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