#spinnwebe Logs : Put that in my Velvet Vulva!

<zompist> oh man. someone should bring a Velvet Vulva to the pggtg.
<zompist> oh lord, she has a vulva sleeping bag.
<agt_orang> My Little Vulva (c)
<agt_orang> the Vulvatubbies!
<agt_orang> again again!
<zompist> this picture of a hand pawing at a velvet vulva... now that be wack.
<agt_orang> the sleeping bag is deeply disturbing. any signs of a lunch box?
<mdxi> coin purse?
<zompist> they're unique creations... you can commission her to do one.
<TomFish> hat?
<TomFish> loincloth?
<zompist> she does mention hats, yes.
<zompist> she has note cards, too. you can "send a message about sustainable agriculture and conscientious purchasing power" by buying cards that show a woman breast-feeding a 6-year-old.
* SeanQ is back, and trying desperately to drive that mental image out of his mind
<TomFish> I think that "sends a message of one fucked up kid"
<agt_orang> sustainable agriculture and conscientious purchasing power are what I think of when I see people breastfeeding large children.
<agt_orang> That and graham crackers.
<zompist> It's an idea whose time has come, with its expression of the sacred, sensual, life-giving, tempting, target-like nature of the feminine genitalia. Once one begins thinking along these lines, the possibilities seem boundless.
<Raven> I'm sure bounds could be found.
<zompist> i hope she does a whole line of body parts.
<Kyol> So what's the kitsch - these're all single line drawings, or something? She's retarded? Or is she an ape?
<Kyol> I don't _get_ it.
<zompist> hey, she's sacred and sensual and all that.
<Kyol> ...And retarded or an ape.. It's possible.
<Kyol> Perhaps.. perhapsperhaps she's a retarded _ape_.
<agt_orang> Coming soon: the Angora Anus.
<zompist> the Plush Penis.
<Kyol> Am I being mean?
<Raven> Maybe a little. She just sounds goofy, like artists can be.
<Raven> Her murals are actually kinda neat.
<zompist> yeah, the bathroom mural is pretty cool.
<zompist> her prose is just so gooshy, though.
<agt_orang> She's a space cadet, but she doesn't seem mean or judgemental
<agt_orang> no argument here. I have an unreasoning irrational hatred of "faeries" and unicorns and fantasy goop...
<Raven> And the web site's not tacky, and she's not conceited like Rebeca.
<agt_orang> at least of the airbrushed web art variety
<Raven> Yeah, I'm sticking with the "goofy" option. :)
<zompist> oh, i'm sure the world would be a better place if more people were like her.
<agt_orang> lot more sca meetings in the park, anyway. :)
<zompist> it's just... "Naturally, what you put in your Velvet Vulva can have tremendous symbolic and magickal significance."
<zompist> you don't even have to add a riposte to that, you can consider it made.
<Raven> I wouldn't go so far as to think we need more of her. :)
<zompist> if there *were* more of her, they'd all get together and sew a 120-foot vulva.
<agt_orang> I'm sure she would consider our gibes and jokes at her expense to be hurtful and to contain an unhealthy amount of negative energy,
<agt_orang> so you know,
<agt_orang> fuck her, anyway.
<Raven> even the smallest Pocket Vulvas have sacred space within which to place magickal items, mementos, or meaningful -appropriately sized - artifacts
<Raven> Yeah, there's not much left to do there, zomp....
<agt_orang> and her taffeta twat, or whatever it is
<Raven> Personally, the third picture looks almost creepy. I mean, grope that bag, whydon'tcha?
<zompist> yeah, that's a bit over the top.
<agt_orang> "don't go puttin no too-big lingam in your little yarn oni!"
<zompist> tho' the first one, with the velvet vulva in position, so to speak, is ineffably weird.
<agt_orang> yoni/oni
<Raven> http://www.artgoddess.com/bridal.html - retrieval
<Raven> Because you want to place the bag at groin level as you dig throught it.
<zompist> oh man. they used it to *carry the rings* at their wedding.
<agt_orang> "Hey ma! got any gum in your purse?"
<Raven> Heheheheh.
<Raven> "How about some Gummi Foetuses?"
<agt_orang> eeeew
<agt_orang> hehe
<zompist> there must be a picture of the best man fisting the bride's velvet vulva.
<agt_orang> I don't know what's on the clothing page, but it's friggin' huge...
<zompist> "i can't find the rings!" "deeper, deeper!"
<mdxi> a little yarn oni would be cool tho
<agt_orang> ah! _Nothing_ is on the clothing page.
<agt_orang> Is it hard to get anything in the purse the first time you use it?
<Raven> They send a tube of lube along with the purse.
<zompist> she ships them with some ketchup packets embedded inside.
<agt_orang> eeeeew(x2)
<agt_orang> hmm.. purse snatching? no, nothing there... move on...