"Oh, it's up there."

<Stan_Xhiao> I've seen a couple ladies' rooms in my time and, yeah, they're on the whole a lot more plush than the men's
<Samwise> Plus, less urine sprayed about.
<Stan_Xhiao> Oh yeah, Sam, carpeting a bad idea in the Men's
<spinn> man, some guy on this floor got a trick dribble dick for april fool's
<Stan_Xhiao> What, did his original equipment break?
<spinn> under the urinal is a real mess some days. disgusting.
<Stan_Xhiao> Yeah, my last place was like that
<Stan_Xhiao> Sometimes a whole quart on the floor
<Stan_Xhiao> I mean, how hard /is/ it?
<Stan_Xhiao> Christ, some guys need a bib or something
<TMR> A scrotal bib?
<Samwise> I certainly understand a light misting of the area due to backsplash...but nothing should be pooling.
<Stan_Xhiao> The DribbleBib(TM)
<tieboy> And how much pubic hair needs to fall out of their pants and stick to the urinal?
<tieboy> are they grooming themselves while they're in there?
<spinn> yeah, like, they're just still used to kiddie urinals in grade school, maybe
<Stan_Xhiao> -And let them eat cake!
<spinn> <sssss> "oh, it's up there." <ssssss>
<Stan_Xhiao> And there's always a dried snot collection on the wall next to the urinal
<Stan_Xhiao> Pick, flick, pluck, drop
<TMR> I heard of certain German urinary facilities that is little more than a tiled wall with water streaming down it, and a little ditch at the bottom with a drain.
<Stan_Xhiao> I've seen those here!
<Stan_Xhiao> Like at Billy Bob's
<TMR> I like the concept. You CAN'T miss.
<Stan_Xhiao> and the potty trailers at the circus
<CrazyClimber> that's more modern than the urinals at Fenway and Wrigley
<CrazyClimber> those don't even have flowing water, just gravity
<Stan_Xhiao> "Don't look up here your p[issing on you're shoes!"
<TMR> Just piss on the wall?
<CrazyClimber> everyone gathers around a long basin and tries to find a place to not look
<TMR> Oh. That's not what I was talking about.
<Stan_Xhiao> Before I was married I took great joy in whizzing out the window. Saved plenty of walking to the can.
<TMR> That's the "howdy, neighbor" trough.
<tieboy> the whole trough thing
<Samwise> CC: yeah, I know those...if you accidentally make eye contact, you have to give one, and only one, very manly nod.
<Stan_Xhiao> "Cold enough for ya?"
<Stan_Xhiao> "Deep, too. Har har har!"
<CrazyClimber> fortunately, my bladder can outlast most ball games, so i just wait until i get home.
<TMR> Does your wife frown on you pissing out the window?
<Samwise> Stan: whizzing out the window?? That sounds more "howdy neighbor" than the trough.
<Stan_Xhiao> Then there's those guys who undo their belt and pull down their pants to whizz
<CrazyClimber> "Our garden's been doing so much better since Stan moved in next door."
<Stan_Xhiao> Guy next to me in the can was doing that today
<CrazyClimber> Only reason to do that, stan, is you're wearing your girlfriend's underwear
<Stan_Xhiao> Hmm... good point
<Stan_Xhiao> But some guys go out through the fly seam, while others pull don their waistbands just a notch and go out the top. Either way, DON'T PULL YOUR PANTS DOWN
<Stan_Xhiao> heehee... girlfried's underpants?
<Samwise> The ass of the pants should remain in place.
<Stan_Xhiao> Girlfriend named Nathan Lane, probably
<CrazyClimber> well, you can give them the benefit of the doubt if you want.
<kaufman> or they just hook it around the leg band
<Stan_Xhiao> Maybe they wear their mother's sanitary belt, too
<tieboy> And hey, don't start a conversation with me while we're both peeing, kay?
<spinn> I'm saving a line for a special occasion.
<CrazyClimber> my boss' boss used to love to do that, tie.
<Samwise> Except in the most dire (drunken) circumstances, I cannot start to pee while someone is talking to/looking at me.
<spinn> "[person], I like you and all, but I don't know you well enough to talk to you while I'm holding my dick."
<CrazyClimber> drove me up the freakin' wall.
<tieboy> Yeah, totally
<Stan_Xhiao> When I worked at Radio Shack, the VP would leave the stall door open so we could admire his handiwork
<spinn> thing is, the people who I like are generally not people who will talk to me while peeing. and the people who I don't like, I generally wouldn't want to share that kind of powerhouse punchline with
<Stan_Xhiao> "Hey! C'mere! Let's talk (oomph!) about that (grr-HUH) project!"
<Samwise> We always closed the doors...but conversations while poopin were very common in college.
<Stan_Xhiao> Like the Army
<CrazyClimber> "Hey, Sam, what's up?" "Well, I figure this dirtsnake's about 1/3 out."
<Samwise> Then again, in college we'd play rugby get drunk and enjoy a round of dicktag, so I probably shouldn't use that as a base of comparison.
<spinn> oh, yah, you told us about that
<spinn> I forget if hf was here or not
<spinn> but if he wasn't I'm sure he got a woody for no reason he could determine
<tieboy> Yeah, dicktag. And in highschool, we'd all get loaded and fellate each other. No big deal.
<Samwise> He's probably getting one now, and doens't know why.
<Stan_Xhiao> Now, I was thinking the other day... doesthe term "woody" come from "Woody Wood/pecker/" or from the tumescent organ's hard-as-wood wuality?
<Samwise> I'd have to go with the "hard-as-wood" theory
<Stan_Xhiao> I couldn't find anything about it from AskJeeves
<Stan_Xhiao> That's what I always thought, too
<Kyol> ...can you drive nails with it?
<CrazyClimber> I can enter it into the database so it gets answered.
<Kyol> (railroad spikes, whatever..)
<Stan_Xhiao> No, but you can drivve nails in it
<CrazyClimber> That's what I'm doing now - writing questions for their staff to answer.
<Samwise> But I can see how it might ahve evolved through wood pecker.
<CrazyClimber> Already in the database is "What is the world's largest penis?"
<Samwise> 18 inches.
<Stan_Xhiao> Whale, right?
<CrazyClimber> so I don't think this will be an issue.
<Stan_Xhiao> Does the organ belong to a certain really big fucking dog?
<CrazyClimber> dunno. i'm in no position to look.