"I am the apricot of embezzelment!"

<CrazyClimber> got like 30 seconds between stealth meetings.
<agent_orange> Damn. That boss has some recuperative powers
<CrazyClimber> if only you knew.
<CrazyClimber> but she is a she, which i guess is a factor.
<agent_orange> I bet the old butthole hasn't stopped going"BOING-IGN-ING" before she's up and rooting around again!
<CrazyClimber> well, i've made sure there's a surprise for her, so with luck the next one will be a ways off.
<Elkman> The next dirtsnake, or the next meeting?
<CrazyClimber> the current project, she's essentially made up two completely different sets of figures, and needs my help reconciling them.
<zompist> take the average
<agent_orange> (figure 1 + figure 2)/2
<zompist> jinx
<CrazyClimber> that's basically what she's ending up doing.
<Elkman> sqrt(-abs(figure 1 + figure 2))
<agent_orange> showoff
<CrazyClimber> problem is, the two sets of figures measure completely different things, so she's trying to average figures that have nothing to do with each other.
<zompist> and that's a bad thing?
<tieboy> plus, they're action figures
<Elkman> See, that's why I made up that equation. It's going to be an imaginary number.
<zompist> it's going to management, right? all that matters is that there's graphs.
<CrazyClimber> zomp: her boss checked her figures with a calculator just in the first draft.
<CrazyClimber> then carefully laid out the figures he wanted and how he wanted them calculated.
<agent_orange> Average number of postings read as a function of dew point
<Leth> *clickclickclick* Yup, nice hips and ass
<Samwise> Crikey. "What would you like the data to say?"
<zompist> "it looks like you're having trouble getting figures to match! want me to make up some?"
<agent_orange> Ye got yer x-axis, that's the amount, see, and ye got yer y-axis, which measured in arpents, and ye got yer q-axis, which is cheese.
* CrazyClimber wanders off to hallmark.com to see if they have a "Please don't end my career with yours" card that he can give to his boss
<Leth> we'll make one up for you
<Leth> I'm sure we could do a better one than those Hallmark hacks
<agent_orange> yeah, we wanna help!
<agent_orange> What's the big bosses extension?
<tieboy> a Ferarri
<CrazyClimber> 1
* agent_orange gets mr. bigpants on the horn
<CrazyClimber> x loop kr agent orange gets mr. big pants on the horn
<jeeb> CrazyClimber: Substitute orange in the Sea gets the big pants in the alarm
<6>49 'substitute orange'?
<CrazyClimber> x loop kr agent
<jeeb> CrazyClimber: Substitute
<tieboy> ooh, we've got a sub today!
<zompist> we should keep a list of these
<Samwise> Aha! *ripsoffagt'sface* It's old Mr. Withers!
* tieboy puts tacks on agent's seat
<Samwise> He was being funnier than everyone to scare us away!
* zompist snarls, "Who you workin for, buddy?"
*** agent_orange is now known as faux_orange
<faux_orange> Curses!
*** faux_orange is now known as agent_orange
*** CrazyClimber is now known as Agent_Peach
<Agent_Peach> You'll never find me!
*** Agent_Peach is now known as CrazyClimber
<Elkman> x loop fr faux orange
<jeeb> Elkman: orange of forgery
<agent_orange> Orang of Forgery--wow.
<CrazyClimber> man, now i feel all dirty. i ain't ever pretending to be agt again.
<agent_orange> I am the apricot of embezzelment!
<agent_orange> the fig of usury!
<SoiledGreen> the only fruit in the CIA.
<TMR> ...now that J. Edgar's dead, anyhoo.
<agent_orange> and the stinky durian of Failure to yield!