Closed course! Do not try!


<agent_orange> you know, it occurred to me today
<agent_orange> driving past academy sports
<Drusilla> what occurred to you?
<agent_orange> that boi's "anal training" is probably just part of hock's plan to rob every sporting goods store in the twin cities
<Drusilla> and now i need to gouge out my eyes
<Drusilla> again.
<agent_orange> He'll be like some kinda of fag batman villan
<Leth> "They'll never look there!"
<Leth> and he'd be right
<agent_orange> "Nothing for me today, thanks. Come along, Boi." <ka-THUNK ka-THUNK ka-THUNK> "Coming, sir!:
<Leth> "GHAA! Look, just keep it. And leave."
<agent_orange> "Note to self: basketball goes in last, or fielder's glove falls out."
<Drusilla> gouge gouge gouge.
<agent_orange> Cop strip searches boi, shakes him: "I know you've got it somewhere!"
<agent_orange> <rattle rattle clang bang ratle>
<Leth> he'll be like the Hockey Robin Hood, giving the sporting goods away to underpriviledged kids
<Leth> "Um, 'scuse me, thanks and all, but this helmet smells funny"
<Drusilla> poor unsuspecting kids
<agent_orange> "...and this is my merry man, Tie-er Fuck."
<Leth> <unzips mask> Hi kids!
<agent_orange> "Who wants the bobsled? Bobsled? ...I got a fly rod! Who wants the fly rod?
* mdxi calls dibs on the ping-pong paddles
<Drusilla> ok, see, now i'm actually trying to gouge my eyes out
<Drusilla> but my nails are too short
<Maus> Find a spoon.
<mdxi> Drusilla: try not to think about the effect of the grippy coating on the paddles
<agent_orange> "Ninepins, with ladies 12-lb ball! Who got the bowling set?"
<Leth> "Oh look, jumpropes! Who wants jump- Whoopsie! That's small intestine!"
<mdxi> "I got a nerf football here! Oh, no, that's just a rectal prolapse..." *push push push*
<mdxi> god damn you leth. you made me say that.
<Leth> glad to help
<Freyja> "Who likes polo? I got a small horsie here"
<Maus> "Who wants the basketball? You? okay... Who wants the hoop? The backboard?"
<agent_orange> "Compound bow with razor tipped hunting arrows! Hunting-- what? Well, why not? Just pull it ou--Oh, I see. Okay, leave it. Compound bow, no arrrows! Who wants it?"
<Leth> "Huh, exercise bike? No, let's leave that. We'll do something later"
<agent_orange> well, if his ass ever gets stuck open, they can always use him as a carnival game
<agent_orange> three balls for a dollar! get one in, will a prize from the botom shelf!
<Leth> "Look honey! It's the Tunnel Of Lov- er, OHDEARGODAAAAAEEEIIIIIIIII!"
<Drusilla> can we please talk about something else?
<Leth> sure
<agent_orange> "Hey! It's whack-amole! AHHGH! THAT AIN'T NO MOLE!"
<Zole> Wait, I didn't get a chance
<Zole> uh, ANUS
<agent_orange> Whack-a-Rectal-Prolapse
<Leth> "OK, just got back from the Chevy dealer!"
<agent_orange> "Find my keys and we can drive out of here!"
<Leth> "Drivers Wanted! <winkwink> :D"
<agent_orange> Closed course! Do not try!
<Maus> "I could just shit a brick. No, really, watch." .
[Three minute pause]
<Maus> Looks like the ol' anus ran outta steam.
<agent_orange> "I'm s'hungry, I could stuff a whole Subway B.M.T. on whole wheat with cheese and all the veggies except hot peppers, a little bit of yellow mustard, salt & pepper, no oil & vinegar, for here, with chips and a drink, and two stamps, right up my bottmless gaping anal piehole!"
<Drusilla> i hate you.
<Maus> I stand corrected.
<Drusilla> gaaah.
<Leth> guess what's bubbling up from the subconscious tomorrow!
<Drusilla> man.
<Drusilla> first customer to order that will have me laughing in their face.
<Leth> or something
<Maus> Try not to accidentally say "Colossal, Gaping Anus"
<Zole> Nobody caught my Leisuretown reference.
<Drusilla> i was too busy gouging my eyes out, and calling upon Thor to strike agto down
<agent_orange> "Is that to go, or will you fuck it here?"
<Drusilla> i don't ask that.
<Drusilla> thank god.
<agent_orange> "Here, here, people eat on that table. Here, take some of these plastic gloves, at least."
<Maus> "Would you like ass?.. er.. rectum? anus?... NO! uh... fuck it."
<Drusilla> that's it.
<Drusilla> i'm going to ask you at least one of these if you show up tomorrow, Maus
<Sandry> Was that supposed to be a threat?
<Maus> Asking me if I'd like ass? I don't get that enough.
<agent_orange> "I'd like a subway clubfoot up my ass, I mean on white, with hot cheese penis, I mean swiss..."
<Drusilla> nope.
<Drusilla> i just have a very dull shift.

Heather Garvey / Raven /
I want to submit a log!