But one day, soon we hope, there will be plenty of plush toys in space.


<Elkman> And on a mostly-unrelated note, I have a conference call with the Canadian Space Agency at 11 AM.
<Samwise> Ooooo, cool... they have a space agency?
<Samwise> "One small step for man, eh..."
<Elkman> Yeah, apparently. http://www.space.gc.ca
<kaufman> "We float on guard for thee?"
<Kyol> http://www.space.gc.ca/csa_sectors/generic_space_tech/default.asp - White box, black lettering?
<Kyol> House brand satellites?
<Elkman> And rockets that say "ROCKET" on the side.
<Samwise> they'd misspel it, too.
<SoiledGreen> beer?
<jacquilyn> We have a space agency. We even have astronauts.
<jacquilyn> We invented the big arm crane thingy they use to move stuff around in space.
<SoiledGreen> "houston, we have beer.."
<kaufman> like beer
<kaufman> and then you invented another arm crane thingy
<Samwise> to open the beer
* SoiledGreen is drinking a beer.
<kaufman> * SoiledGreen kneels in the direction of Canada
<Elkman> Jacqui: Is this the same arm crane thingy that they have at arcades where you can win a prize if you're agile?
<Samwise> They're working on a new component, the "shotgunner" model.
<jacquilyn> Isn't it a little early for that, soiled?
<jacquilyn> Umm, gee, elk, not quite, no.
<SoiledGreen> never too early.
<Kyol> Never too early.
<jacquilyn> There being a decided lack of plush toys in space.
<kaufman> sam: you see, if they were as kooky as we are, you could drive across the border and see the sign, Welcome to Manitoba, Home of the Arm Crane Thingies
<Kyol> jacqui: But one day, soon we hope, there _will_ be plenty of plush toys in space. And We know the canadarm was designed for that eventuality.
<Samwise> The Manitoba Arm Crane Thingies would beat the smeg out of the Expos.
<kaufman> which of course would also be a halfway decent name for a band
<Samwise> canadiarm
<Elkman> They could use it on asteroids to get practice. They could use the arm crane thingie to save the earth from an asteroid about to hit it.
<kaufman> elk: there you go
<Samwise> By throwing plush toys and, if necessary, beer at it.
* kaufman sees a plot for a sequel to Strange Brew
<SoiledGreen> throwing beer?
<SoiledGreen> noooooooo!
<Elkman> http://www.space.gc.ca/csa_sectors/hum_pre/english/flights/sts_100/kidstat/project/day12/default.html -- a drawing of Canadarm2.
<Samwise> SG, they have to do it, to save the breweries.
<kaufman> <Bob> Hey, get the asteroid, eh?
<kaufman> <Doug> No way, hoser, I'm trying to grip that plush toy
<Samwise> How we gonna get back to earth without fuel, eh? Don't worry, eh, I gotta take a leak pretty bad.
<jacquilyn> On behalf of all of Canada, I'd like to personally thank you all for extending the art form that is Canada jokes into a whole new realm.
<kaufman> the final frontier
<Elkman> Hey, it wasn't my idea to draw a spacecraft holding a giant "No Vacancy" sign over Canada.
<Kyol> He, it'll keep up until you export smarties into the continental 48, eh.
<Samwise> The good smarties, not the acidy powdery crap that goes by the same name.
<jacquilyn> I routinely export smarties into the US.
<jacquilyn> If any of you want them, just let me know and I'll ship you some.
<Samwise> Do you dump 'em in a condom, tie it off, and swallow it before crossing?
<jacquilyn> No, Sam, I mail them.
<Samwise> *gasp*
* jacquilyn wonders if one could make money sellng Smarties to Americans via eBay?
<Samwise> Hrm. Is there any way to ship something in such a way that it stays cold?
<Elkman> Sam: Yeah, that's the way to make them sound appealing.
<Leth> can't sell food
<kaufman> sam: besides dry ice?
<Samwise> Yes, Ken.
<Elkman> Liquid nitrogen?
<jacquilyn> Not even a confection item like Smarties, Leth?
<Leth> I don't think so
<Samwise> Seriously. Joe Schmoe in one city wants to send something across the nation to Jane Schmoe. But he wants it to stay around 30 degrees farenheit. How does he do it?
<kaufman> send via USPS with big labels saying KEEP ABOVE 50F
<Kyol> And Dry Ice is a tricky thing to get into the postal system - seems that a fair number of shipping companies won't deal with it.
<Leth> When my friend sends ice cream, he sends it in a special cooler with dry ice
<Leth> costs a bundle
<Samwise> Ah, fuck that then.
<Samwise> no runzas for you guys.
<Kyol> I still have like 30 boxes of smarties in a bag from the Niagara Falls souvenier shop.
<kaufman> dry ice is how your neighbors at Omaha Steaks do it
<Kyol> I occasionally break out a box.
<Elkman> Sam: He puts the item on a train heading east from Omaha at 50 miles per hour, on a refrigerator car at 20 degrees Fahrenheit. It meets a train going westbound from Chicago at 45 mph with a refrigerator car set to 30 degrees Fahrenheit.
<Elkman> Where do they meet, and what's the final temperature of the package?
<kaufman> 1522F
<Samwise> And how far did the fly fly during that time?
<kaufman> kaboom
<kaufman> trick question, flies don't fly under 45 degrees F
<Leth> why would they be on the same track? Doesn't seem like an efficient way to ship
<Elkman> Actually, it's a trick question. The two trains weren't on the same track. The westbound train was actually going to Billings, Montana.
<kaufman> sorry, Leth, I have a one-track mind
<Samwise> Heh. The old puzzle about a fly that leaves the faster train at 80 mph and turns around when it hits a train. The best way is of course to find how long he has been flying when they meet... one student said he tried to figure the distances for each back and forth trip and add them all together, the professor said "But that's just what I did."
<kaufman> but Omaha's at about 41 degrees, 15 minues north, and Chicago's at 41 degrees, 50, so the two trains will miss by over 30 miles.
<Samwise> Oh, duhhhhhh.
<Samwise> Runza will ship them cold themselves. That's nice of them.
<Elkman> So if the package starts at 41 degrees, it won't be frozen.
<kaufman> unless the latitude's in Kelvins
<kaufman> [where's Kemlo when we need him?]
<jacquilyn> What's a 'runza'>?
<Samwise> http://runza.com/whatzarunza.htm
<Samwise> bhahahahahahah http://runza.com/runzarex.htm scroll to the bottom
<kaufman> something you usually don't find outside Nebraska
<Elkman> It looks like a hamburger stuffed inside a hot dog bun.
<Samwise> But it's got onion and cabbage and it's got a lotta spices.
<Samwise> It's fucking GOOD.
<jacquilyn> I know high cabbage content is always one of the things I look for in a fast food.
<Elkman> Damn. I just got the official word that I can't ask questions about back bacon in space
<Samwise> In space, no one can hear you fry bacon.
<Kyol> Can you call them hosers if they want you to do something disagreeable?
<Elkman> Probably not. We sort of want to keep them as customers.
<Kyol> Can you slip "take off, eh" into the conversation somewhere?

Heather Garvey / Raven / raven@xnet.com
I want to submit a log!