"Scotty, set teleporter for anger up the cats!"

<tieboy> can you set phasers on anything between 'stun' and 'kill'?
<Drusilla> No.
<Mia_D> "Set phasers to...still?"
<Mia_D> Kun?
<mdxi> i was gonna say "liquify" but that would be a setting somewhere *past* "kill"
<mdxi> "rough up a bit"?
<mdxi> "stab in the upper arm"?
<Mia_D> "poke"
<mdxi> "whip"
<tieboy> just seems like the technology could be advanced enough to have more than two settings. my fucking blender has 66 settings.
<mdxi> "frappe"
<mdxi> "flay"
<Drusilla> they have other things for that
<Drusilla> hyposprays and such
<spinn> "kill/ish/"
<mdxi> "mostly dead"
<spinn> "stun liver and kidneys, but excite bowels and sinuses"
<mdxi> "lightly mutilate"
<mdxi> "nasal drip"
<Freyja> *slap a doodle*
<tieboy> "indian burn"
<mdxi> "noogie"!
<Freyja> *tickle*
<mdxi> "six inches" and or "thumps"
<tieboy> "stub"
<mdxi> "sprain"
<mdxi> "concuss"
<Freyja> *booboo*
<Mia_D> "bruise"
<tieboy> "cotton mouth"
<mdxi> "hyperextend"
<tieboy> "pull a hammy"
<mdxi> "chafe"
<tieboy> "verklempt"
<mdxi> "flesh to stone (reversible)"
<spinn> "thousand magic fingers"
<mdxi> "magic missle"
<spinn> "shiatzu, wide beam"
<Drusilla> i will not write star trek parodies again...
<tieboy> "get ABBA songs stuck in head"
<mdxi> "massage with full release"
<Freyja> "obtain"
<tieboy> "ass"
<spinn> heheh
<spinn> hey! "close shave"
<Leth> "Schumify"
<Lore> "rile up"
<tieboy> "kemlofy"
<mdxi> "wiggle patella around oh god stop that feels so fuckin' gross"
<spinn> there's a useful setting
<spinn> why not a set of every day household settings, you know, you don't need to stun and kill every day
<spinn> "gloss and shine"
<Lore> "kickban"
<Mia_D> "sponge"
<mdxi> "lubricate"
<Leth> "splooge"
<tieboy> "febreeze"
<tieboy> "wiggle cord"
<Leth> "annoy like that damn fireball bridge on the last level of Super Mario Brothers where the goddamned game cheats so motherfucking blatantly, fucking Bowzer sucks ass"
<Mia_D> "scrub, then wipe down with a damp cloth"
<Lore> "emoliate"
<Freyja> "rinse and repeat"
<tieboy> "infotain"
<Lore> Check your mail, Chris.
<tieboy> "check mail"
<Freyja> "innovate"
<mdxi> "cheat"
<Leth> "assimilate"
<Freyja> "Set phasers to Innovate" is such a good team-building motto
<mdxi> "ballmer"
<tieboy> "bridgette hall"
<Leth> "surgically enhance"
<Leth> "Elk 'em"
<mdxi> "deflate"
<spinn> "emergency destruction of nudie mags before mom gets to the top of the stairs"
<Lore> "pants"
<Mia_D> "bake"
<tieboy> "flush toilet that second time"
<Lore> "riff"
<mdxi> "flog"
<Lore> "do the right thing"
<spinn> "change to ABC"
<tieboy> "get 'em, smoke 'em"
<mdxi> "emulsify"
<spinn> okay look, it's not just me. the sky really /is/ a little bluer.
<tieboy> "insinuate"
<spinn> "bide"
<Freyja> "confuse"
<Lore> "sort"
<Mia_D> "stack"
<spinn> sort.
<spinn> "Okay, men...set phasers on sort!" fiddle fiddle "FIRE!" >zhwzzzzz< flip flip flip flip flip
<Leth> "Hey, I've been Elked!"
<tieboy> "stare blankly at PBS"
<Mia_D> "masturbate"
<spinn> "remove larry king from view"
<spinn> oh, wait, that's "kill"
<Drusilla> exactly
<Drusilla> see, so many of these are kill.
<Freyja> there you go, full circle
<tieboy> "shake groove thang"
<Lore> "don't kill"
<Drusilla> that's stun
<Drusilla> see?
<tieboy> "blind with science"
<Lore> "don't kill or stun"
<spinn> "grand mal seizure" "grand mal seizure with mouth-foaming"
<tieboy> "facilitate connectivity"
<spinn> "ennui"
<tieboy> "flick earlobe"
<spinn> "purple nurple"
<Mia_D> "aloof"
<tieboy> "change pepsi to wild cherry pepsi"
<spinn> "kill, but in a PG way"
<Lore> "apologize"
<tieboy> "mull over options"
<Lore> "vacillate"
<Mia_D> "Grope breasts, larry king style"
<Drusilla> eeeeeeeeew
<Drusilla> how?
<spinn> http://www.spinnwebe.com/temp/larry.jpg
<tieboy> "blow burp air across room"
<Mia_D> "procrastinate"
<spinn> "highly accurate kill when used by protagonist, laughably inaccurate when used by antagonist"
<mdxi> mmm, vectored burp
<Lore> "make clean"
<spinn> "lightly season"
<tieboy> "napjerk"
<Lore> "take to the limit one more time"
<Mia_D> "bore"
<spinn> boy, wouldn't "bore" cause some embarrassing confusion
<Lore> "delight"
<Freyja> "resuscitate"
<tieboy> "procrastinate"
<spinn> "obfuscate"
<tieboy> "remember name of that guy on that show about cars"
<Lore> "dry clean toupee"
<tieboy> "draw little line after cents on check"
<Mia_D> "complain about the weather"
<spinn> "F sharp over middle C"
<tieboy> "scrutinize phone bill"
<Lore> "employ computer graphics major"
<Leth> "favor by two touchdowns"
<spinn> "deploy conputer graphics major"
<tieboy> "harp"
<Lore> "fanservice"
<spinn> computer graphics majors shoot fully-formed from the phaser and collapse in a heap on your enemy
<Freyja> so we're back to kill
<mdxi> "fist"
<tieboy> "wheedle"
<spinn> "gentle spring rain"
<Mia_D> "whistle"
<tieboy> "complete Jr. Jumble"
<Freyja> "overkill"
<Lore> "bonk, with actual bonking noise"
<mdxi> "intravenously marinade"
<Mia_D> "enjoy 'love is' "
<Lore> "rdeem"
<Lore> "redeem"
<mdxi> "rm"
<mdxi> "fsck"
<tieboy> "nose-whistle"
<Leth> "ponder"
<Lore> "re-educate, and introduce back into society as fully-functioning citizen"
<spinn> "fellate second chair violinist"
<Mia_D> "caption"
<spinn> "lesbianize"
<Lore> "Invoke Occam's razor"
<tieboy> "neuter"
<mdxi> "field-strip"
<Freyja> "hug"
<tieboy> "mute Becker"
<spinn> "kill, but only if I wouldn't regret it later"
<Freyja> "curse"
<tieboy> "decide"
<Freyja> "shake fist and mutter"
<Lore> "auto-rewind"
<mdxi> "second-guess"
<Mia_D> "hide under the piano"
<tieboy> "baste"
<Freyja> "hit on"
<mdxi> "kebob"
<spinn> "Kevin Bacon degree determination"
<mdxi> "grope"
<Lore> "method acting"
<spinn> "fluff"
<tieboy> "wonder what's so damn sticky"
<mdxi> "flange"
<tieboy> "rhyme"
<spinn> "minty"
<Freyja> "overreact"
<Lore> ""
<Lore> "out"
<Freyja> "outlast"
<Mia_D> "fold"
<Drusilla> "suffocate"
<spinn> "create ideas"
<tieboy> "represent"
<Mia_D> "repent"
<Drusilla> "riff"
<Mia_D> "praise jesus"
<spinn> captain, no! his phaser is set on "diss"!
<mdxi> "foam"
<spinn> heh. "silly string"
<spinn> "2d10 + 5"
<tieboy> "de-wedgie"
<Lore> "make pun on name"
<Lore> "give physics professors fits"
<Freyja> "gossip"
<tieboy> "keep hot side hot, cool side cool"
<spinn> geezer
<mdxi> "half-nelson to a double-arm DDT"
<Freyja> "entertain"
<tieboy> "get mad all over again about Jar-Jar"
<spinn> "spank, but in a punitive way rather than sexual"
<Lore> "mollify"
<Lore> "part hair"
<Lore> "take temperature"
<Mia_D> "perm"
<spinn> "pluck nose hair, tight beam"
<tieboy> "interview"
<Mia_D> "make everything taste like pork"
<Lore> "cause to fondly remember Julliard"
<Lore> "bukkake"
<spinn> "find planet", "fix stuff", "get kirk the girl"
<tieboy> "make oil for one last 8 days"
<spinn> "kick ass, procure list of names"
*** maime has joined #spinnwebe
<Freyja> "taunt"
<maime> hola
<mdxi> "eat last twinkie while no one's looking"
<Freyja> "laugh evilly"
<tieboy> "make you go hmmmm"
<spinn> "cohesive allen wrench beam for that one size you can never find"
<Mia_D> "write, direct, and star in a musical about dogs"
<DML> "huracanrana", "moonsault"
<spinn> "poodle-groom"
<mdxi> "euphemize"
<tieboy> "buy Clapper"
<tieboy> "misunderstand"
<spinn> whoo that's all I got
<spinn> "curse" was good
<raven> Is that right above "swear drunkenly"?
<spinn> kinda figure you shoot somebody with it, and there's the sound of maracas and drums
<spinn> lights dim and the wavery spirit of Yokimbo floats around
<Mia_D> I liked minty. Only because the phrase "Set phasers to Minty" is suprisingly amusing.
<Lore> "magic missle"
<Lore> Did someone already do that one?
<spinn> yeah
<Freyja> "thank profusely"
<spinn> lore was knocking me over
<raven> "I totally shot you with magic missle!"
<spinn> "did not!" "but magic missiles never miss!" "nyuh-UH!" "yuh-HUH!"
<Lore> I was. I was feeling limp and detumescent next to Tie.
<spinn> shee, then I am but a lowly speck on tie's floating sputum
<tieboy> you're always stiff and throbby in my eyes
<tieboy> both of you
<spinn> awww tht's sweet
<spinn> and kinda faggy
<Lore> But I'm playing everquest, so I have an excuse.
<spinn> shiatzu, wide beam.
[5 minutes pass....]
<mdxi> ping?
<mdxi> "protuberate"?
<Lore> "put a moose in her caboose"
<Mia_D> pong
<spinn> "ping", shit
<spinn> that would've been good
<Lore> There's no statute of limitations, Greg.
<Lore> It IS good.
<Lore> Good for you!
* raven sighs and opens up the log AGAIN.
<Freyja> "log"
<Freyja> ok, this is the last one, I swear
<Drusilla> "swoon"
<mdxi> "tweee-fraaaaap"
<Drusilla> "annoy raven by continuing riff"
<Freyja> "lie"
<spinn> "vex"
<MisterQ> wooo!
<spinn> "exacerbate"
<sol-D> "masticate in a harsh manner"
<MisterQ> "Znuh?"
<Mia_D> "anger up the cats"
<mdxi> "telefrag"
<mdxi> actually, i guess that would be a transporter setting
<MisterQ> "Scotty, set teleporter for anger up the cats!"
<spinn> heheh
<spinn> there's a hum, then all over the ship: "mreeowww!" "hsssss!"
<Lore> "harsh mellow"
<Mia_D> heh. Damn you sue rose.
<mdxi> Episode 312: the Trouble With Tabbies
<MisterQ> "Damnit, Jim, I'm a doctor not a veternari" mreeeoowww! scratch scratch!
<Leth> "Cause a kind of hush...all over the world"
<Leth> whoa
<Leth> I typed that long ago, and never hit Enter
<Leth> oh well
<Drusilla> there's always the "genetic mishap" transporter setting
<Down10> ...What? Did I miss out on a yet another classic #sw riff?
<spinn> yup
<spinn> loser
<Drusilla> you did.
<Down10> :,(
<Drusilla> there
<Drusilla> there
<Mia_D> you sure did.
<Mia_D> dork
<spinn> tie and lore were ticklin' mah funnybones likes wuz no tamarry
<Down10> Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!
* Down10 bangs head repeatedly against wall
<mdxi> "bang head repeatedly against wall"
<Drusilla> oh, fuck.
<Lore> "drawl"
<mdxi> there, now you're part of the riff
<spinn> heheh
<spinn> oh, hey
<spinn> or: there's still only stun and kill, but different types to choose from
<tieboy> "putter"
<Drusilla> i like to feel my hands crush someone's larynx...
<Drusilla> i mean, if i were going to kill anyone
<Drusilla> and i'm not.
<Lore> "weird out"
<Down10> "grope"
<Mia_D> "piss off"
<Lore> "submit"
<raven> "crush larynx"
<Freyja> "kiss and make up"
<Down10> "remember next line"
<Drusilla> "exsanguinate"
<Mia_D> "ponder"
<Freyja> "(a)bort, (r)etry, (f)ail"
<tieboy> "googlewhack"
<sol-D> "Get that one song in your head. you know, the one that goes Doo Doo duh dah doo.."
<spinn> heh. "inflict 'mmmmbop'"
<MisterQ> "Spock, where the hell is the rest of your butt?" "It seems that Scotty set the transporter setting to genetic mishap." "Mrreeeoww" "Shut up, cat-headed red shirted ensign!"
<spinn> "notarize"
<Lore> Notarize heh.
<raven> "validate parking"
<tieboy> "convince self that spackling will help"
<Down10> "flail madly"
<spinn> "validate parking"
<spinn> damitfuckindamnit!
<raven> bahahaha
<spinn> HOW
<spinn> GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY HEAD
<Lore> "moon"
<Down10> "lift up skirt"
<Drusilla> "Steal raven's line"
<MisterQ> "Grope around blindly"
<Mia_D> "chew tinfoil"
<Drusilla> "jump into spinn's head"
<MisterQ> "Have no clue whats going on at all"
<Lore> "clap on"
<tieboy> "squint at carburator"
<Down10> "jinx!"
<spinn> "chakra realignment"
<Down10> "walk the dinosaur"
<sol-D> "Ass turns into a giant crab that is pinching your ass."
<Freyja> "bounce"
<tieboy> "move cheese"
<Lore> "disembark"
<MisterQ> "random pointless saying"
<spinn> "knock on door from far away"
<MisterQ> "Where is your precious Jesus now?"
<Freyja> "prank"
<tieboy> "cough in restroom stall"
<Lore> "vasectomy"
<MisterQ> "Un Chien Somethingleu"
<spinn> "erase chalkboard"
<Lore> "muss"
<MisterQ> "Flog the beastie"
<Freyja> "insult mother"
<Drusilla> "update site"
<spinn> handy
<MisterQ> "Have a not so fresh cat feeling"
<Down10> "promote zine"
<MisterQ> "Writing up a Schumin"
<tieboy> "retort"
<spinn> "sew button"
<Mia_D> "steal"
<Freyja> "use words instead of fists"
<Down10> "freshen breath"
<spinn> "install linux"
<Down10> you all could use that one
<MisterQ> "Tastes great"
<Lore> "circulate e-petition"
<MisterQ> "verb noun"
<Down10> "fight global terrorism" (still in beta, sadly)
<Lore> "advance plit"
<sol-D> my breath IS fresh, consarnit
<raven> "go blib"
<tieboy> "rekindle love affair with collectable Hummel figurines"
<Mia_D> "have adventures in tricorner hats"
<Lore> "advance plot"
<MisterQ> "Court courtesan"
<Lore> "frazzim jazzim"
<spinn> okay, q's about ruined that for me
<Drusilla> there there
<Down10> "visit humorous website and send link to friends"
<MisterQ> sorry there
<MisterQ> er ""
<tieboy> "peep"
<Freyja> "reprimand"
<Down10> "apologize"
<Mia_D> "sigh sadly"
<Freyja> "nag"
<MisterQ> "sigh loudly"
<Down10> "slap"
<Drusilla> "put on sourcerunner staff"
<tieboy> "farmer hanky"
<MisterQ> "hit someone with a fish"
<Mia_D> "whine"
<tieboy> "gleek"
<Down10> "sploink"
<tieboy> "look okay in fedora"
<Freyja> "walk away passive-agressively"
<Mia_D> "yoing"
<Down10> "...stall..."
<MisterQ> "hit someone agressive-passivly"
<Down10> That's the same as "grope", isn't it?
<tieboy> "teabag"
<Drusilla> not quite
<Drusilla> sure, steal my idea...
<Drusilla> "snowball"
<Down10> "pearl necklace"
<tieboy> "reply to be removed from list"
<MisterQ> "Meow Mix song"
<Down10> "swagger"
<Lore> "establish congenial relationship, make lots of suggestive yet ultimately harmless comments, then get drunk together one night and make a sloppy, harshly deflected pass, be unable to fully recover dignity even afterwards, and slowly drift apart"
<Mia_D> "stumble over rock"
<MisterQ> same diff
<Down10> "pull a boner"
<Lore> Okay, I think I'm done.
<Freyja> "thank god"
<Down10> "closure"
<Down10> me too
<MisterQ> ditto
<tieboy> i reserve the right to not be done
<sol-D> I'm hungry.
<Lore> You're still not done with the co-worker butt thing.
<tieboy> fuck no
<spinn> she got the rear motion that makes him need lotion