So, she's looking for a guy with no arms.
<KemloCaesar> Damn, I'm trying to remember - the woman whose Marry Me Now, Impudent Mongrel page was on Geocities....
<KemloCaesar> (what was her name again?)
<KemloCaesar> how does she compare to MarryTheresa.com?
<Gayo> MaryRomantic, or something like that, wasn't it?
<spinn> yah, I just checked in with her a few hours ago
<spinn> she's still unmarried
<spinn> and actually I think she's more entertaining than marrytheresa
<me_tew> Yeah, but MarryTheresa had a billboard.
<me_tew> Did MaryRomantic have a billboard?
<me_tew> I think _not_.
<me_tew> End of story.
<spinn> so that's how they compare
<Dodge> Whatever happened to the chick where you had to read her whole site and send in the seven keywords to prove you'd read it before she'd even talk to your ass?
<KemloCaesar> Dodge - that's MaryRomantic.
<KemloCaesar> And why she only wanted to talk to asses....
<spinn> she's downgraded her requirements though
<spinn> just on MaryCon Baker, I guess
<Dodge> Yeah, I bought the Prima guide to find out the keywords.
<spinn> actually I downloaded them and did a search for the italics
<spinn> it was like ten works, lemme see...
<spinn> something like "I want to try to learn to please you on your terms"
<spinn> mm, 12
<spinn> that might be right
<Freyja> "I understand that you're looking for a man who either doesn't masturbate or who doesn't condone masturbation for himself and would prefer to live without it. I fit what you're looking for in this regard."
<spinn> "And I can say this sentence in person with a straight face."
<Samwise> So, she's looking for a guy with no arms.
<Freyja> there's not even a need for a joke w4ith a statement like that
<spinn> you wonder if she pulls sheafs of paper out of her sachel when you meet her
<spinn> with scripts and responses for various contingencies
<spinn> for you and her
<Samwise> Ewww.. what would she be like in bed?
<me_tew> Sam: Motionless.
<spinn> Hi. I fit what you're looking for in this regard
<spinn> TAKE ME NOW YOU LUSTY MAN
*** DML has left #spinnwebe
<Leth> although on the upside, that thought can be used to scare off Dan
<Leth> never know when that can be handy
<KemloCaesar> She must have been born toilet-trained.
<spinn> "Hello, Mother, I see you can provide milk. You fit what I am looking for in that regard."
<Samwise> Hrm. Yeah, and I'll just bet she's never taken it up the ass.
<spinn> probably not. her anal sphincter can probably be used to shape iron scrollwork
<me_tew> Swallow coal, shit diamonds.
<Gayo> *snicker* Nnh. There's probably a cabal somewhere devoted to screwing with her as much as posible via e-mail.
<Leth> what kind of ruffian would do such a dastardly thing
<Leth> that's horrible
<Samwise> I mean, what kind of psycho would set up a new address just for the purposes of messing with her.
<spinn> which reminds me, sam, we haven't had an update recently on that e-mail address you made to mess with maryromantic
<Samwise> Yeah, but I haven't trained my followers to expect updates.
<Dodge> I'm certain CJones420@hotmail.com hasn't got a clue how his name got attached.
<Gayo> Someone should incorporate her into the Turing test, actually. It seems like the sort of thing you could feasibly get a program to do.
<Dodge> "You're walking through the desert and you see MaryRomantic lying on her back, she'll die if you don't flip her over, but you're not helping. Why aren't you helping, Leon?"
<Freyja> "Cause I don't want to deal with all the paperwork"
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