"Largely Facetious Essays On Various Items, Mostly Pop Culture But Some Random Other Stuff Too, With Letter Grades At The End As If We Were Reviewing Them. Get It?"
*** Lore has joined #spinnwebe
<Lots42> hi lore
<Lore> Hiya Lots, Freyja, Lore, me_tew.
<Lore> Wherefore swoon?
<Freyja> fan :)
<Lore> Oh, hey. Thanks.
<Freyja> will try to keep the hysterical behavior to a minimum
<Lots42> in here?
<tieboy> he's used to it
<CrazyClimber> in fact, if lore is so jaded that he doesn't want the exquisite oral sex, i'll take it
<tieboy> speaking of which, i just dribbled coffee all down my shirt
<Lore> Well, as long as it's exquisite.
<Lore> I've decided I'm no longer settling for merely marvelous oral sex.
<CrazyClimber> well, then, i'll take the marvelous oral sex that lore doesn't want
<Lots42> I'll take the merely marvelous oral sex
<CrazyClimber> ha! i win!
<Lots42> I'm not sharing with Bob
<CrazyClimber> damn right you aren't
<Freyja> wait, wait, one at a time, I'll have to start taking appointments
<Freyja> wait a minute
<Lore> Speaking of which, the book is on for October.
<Lore> And I can announce it and everything.
<Lore> In fact, here I go:
<Lots42> I'll be the Lore double they send out to have assisins shoot at
<Freyja> *hysterical fan behavior*
* trumpets blare
<Lore> Freyja: There will be a Ratings book coming out froM random House this October, available at finer bookstores near you.
* Freyja sets up her tent in front of Barnes and Nobles
<Lore> There, it's announced.
<Lots42> Oral sex in front of Barnes and Nobles?
<Lots42> Finally, an excuse to go
<tieboy> not Nobles
<CrazyClimber> tie: it was the plural, i thought
<Kyol> Lore: What if I only have _crappy_ bookstores near me?
<Lore> Kyol: Amazon will probably carry it.
<KemloCaesar> Incidentally, when did you get Canadian snack food?
<tieboy> hey, did you pick a subtitle?
<Lore> And there has been no official subtitle pick yet, although your A-Z from A-F is in the running.
<tieboy> feel free to use "Lore Scores the Ignored, Adored and Abhored" too
<bisti> mmmm.... abhored
<KemloCaesar--> Lore'd Scored
<Lore> Well, the problem seems to be that the marketing folks feel that wit confuses people.
<Freyja> wit confuses marketing people, so it's no wonder
<antihero> wit does confuse most people
<tieboy> "These Are Ratings of Things That You Wouldn't Normally Rate. Do You See?"
<spinn> "A Book About Ratings Of Things, And It's Funny :|"
<Lore> That's what I'm told. Even as we speak, dedicated copyeditors (or perhaps copy editors) are futzing with my conditional clauses.
<antihero> i think the book'll do well though, because almost instantly when you open it, it's apparent what's going on, and that it's good stuff
<spinn> you're gonna be selling a book about 100 Little Life Lessons I Learned From Watching My Grandchildren
<spinn> after the editors are done with it
<Freyja> The Tao of Lore
<antihero> when spinn frets, and tie worries, lore just is.
<Lore> "Largely Facetious Essays On Various Items, Mostly Pop Culture But Some Random Other Stuff Too, With Letter Grades At The End As If We Were Reviewing Them. Get It?"
<tieboy> By Peter Jennings
<spinn> how about "Think About It." at the end instead
<spinn> that's always a puncher
<spinn> no, wait, godDAMN do I hate that
<spinn> almost as much as I hate "go ahead"
<Lore> In what context do you like "Go ahead"?
<Lore> Are rather, hate it?
<Lore> God DAMN!
<Lots42> With the oral sex?
<me_tew> Go ahead and tell us, Spinn.
<Freyja> what's with the oral sex today?
<CCsPhoneMeeting> if you don't know, lore and i are in trouble
<me_tew> Too much teeth, not enough tongue.
<spinn> when it's pointless. "we're going to go ahead and turn this on"
<spinn> "now let's go ahead and start the meeting"
<tieboy> "I'm gonna go ahead an perform oral sex on Bob"
<Lore> Yes. I feel the phrase "quit fucking around" is much superior in those situations.
<antihero> "now let's go ahead and huglbleugh choke"
<Lore> And in what context do you hate "think about it"?
<tieboy> it needs some synergy
<tieboy> "Let's GROW ahead and start the meeting"
<spinn> mm, like in an article where it's intended to be used for punch
<Lore> I see.
<spinn> but it just pisses me off that the writer is slowing down to tell me to think about something when I should be clearly thinking about it already
<spinn> like, sorry, my eyes were scanning the page but I was really thinking about lunch
<Lore> Like "Malathion kills more people every year than the entire population of Lizard's Bend, Kansas. Think about it."
<Freyja> think about it really reinforces the point, though. Now I can think of nothing else
<antihero> my god- i can't even REMEMBER the population of Lizard's Bend, Kansas.
<spinn> oh, here we go
<spinn> last paragraph
<Lore> Oh, and here's an interesting twist.
<Lore> Or perhaps a refreshing twist.
<Lore> Betsy, my previous editor, has been laid off, and my new editor also edits a Web page called ---
<Lore> Modern Humorist!
<tieboy> Betsy! NOOOOOOOOO
<Lore> So now I can't say mean things in public about them anymore.
<Lore> The MAN has locked up my SOUL.
<Lore> Think about it.
<Lore> Go ahead and think about it.
<spinn> I /will/ kill you.
<Lore> You know what phrase I hate?
<me_tew> That should increase the book sales, at least.
<tieboy> that's the one i hate
<Lore> "We stop serving breakfast at 10:30."
<tieboy> in every goddamn review of any mob show/movie/book or article about James Gandolfini