"Where do you want to be in 10 minutes?"
<SeanQ> okay, guys, i have to interview a candidate for our associate engineer position in half an hour
<SeanQ> give me some good ball-breaking interview questions
<CrazyClimber> "do you swallow?"
<tieboy> "do you find me attractve?"
<SeanQ> c'mon, seriously, i want to take a hard line this time
<CrazyClimber> "if a train leaves seattle going eastbound at 45 mph, and another train leaves chicago going westbound at 35 mph, in what state will they collide and how many people will die?"
<kaufman> [show a picture of a nori] What does this thing do?
<CrazyClimber> "Where do you want to be in 10 minutes?"
<kaufman> cc: North Dakota
<Kyol> CC: A batting cage with my customer downrange.
<CrazyClimber> i keep forgetting that's a state, ken
<CrazyClimber> "if a customer wants to see something at 300 dpi and the browser only shows you 72 dpi, what do you do?"
<spinn> oh goddamnit
<spinn> THAT FUCKING HIRES IMAGE QUESTION
<spinn> always the same frickin sequence.
<spinn> can we get this in hi res?
<spinn> no, the images were made for 72 dpi.
<spinn> then can you give us a screenshot?
<spinn> when of course they can very well get the same frickin screenshot themselves
<SeanQ> CC: i had to walk the woman thru saving the image and opening it in Word... *sigh*
<SeanQ> i explained the whole thing on the phone, and wrote out the instructions in the mail, and 15 minutes later i got a call...
<SeanQ> "It printed out all big. What's wrong?"
<spinn> pebkac, lady
<SeanQ> "Well, where did you print it?" "On my inkjet."
<kaufman> sean: send her the mpeg
<SeanQ> c'mon, gimme some more questions
<SeanQ> DO MY WORK FOR ME DAMMIT!
<kaufman> [show the edusave promo] "What's wrong with this?"
<CrazyClimber> "Would you pee in this cup?"
<spinn> what's the position for, sean?
<SeanQ> third packaging engineer, reports to me... mwahaha
<spinn> to do what?
<spinn> (dunno what a packaging engineer does)
<SeanQ> day-to-day operational stuff... specifications, bills of material
<SeanQ> a little sales support
<CrazyClimber> Hand them a few cans of Rap Musk. "Tell me why you like this."
<spinn> i wouldn't know what to ask.
<spinn> yesterday I was getting some spaghetti and meatballs
<spinn> got some sauce on my hands, I licked it off...but I didn't realize I also had dish soap on my finger too
<spinn> man that sucked.
<CrazyClimber> show them the newark edusave stuff, sean, and tell them it's an inkblot test.
<SeanQ> so i can ask, "HAve you ever done anything as stupid as this:..."
<CrazyClimber> "there's one mistake on this page. find it."
<SeanQ> "If so, how were you lucky enough to survive to tell the tale?"
<CrazyClimber> ask him about his dog
<SeanQ> oh christ almighty
<SeanQ> The scheduled interview with Mr. Landis at 2:00PM today has to be cancelled...
<SeanQ> Mr. Landis just called our office to advise that he has been called into an "EMERGENCY MEETING" which he cannot avoid..
<SeanQ> well, there's my first question: "What was so friggin important that you blew off the interview?"
<spinn> there ya go
<CrazyClimber> "Is Landis even your real name?"
<kaufman> [show a bottle of Newly Bathed Baby] Make up a haiku about this product. NOW!
<SeanQ> ken: i should hold up the bottle and se if he can keep a straight face
<kaufman> if he can't, hire him
<SeanQ> exactly :)
<CrazyClimber> just show him all of the variations on Leth's site and have him figure out which one's real.
<kaufman> "how many k's in snkkt?"
<SeanQ> "Oh, that's a fine design, great job of niche marketing." "Thank you, we'll call."
<SeanQ> versus, "Jesus Christ, you're putting me on, right?" "Nope, but when can you start?"
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