Datadyne: Makers of Fine Black Helicopters Since 1945

<Leth> jeez, mdxi, does that job entail a full cavity search each day, too
<mdxi> Leth: kinda odd, eh? i'm thinking hoax, myself
<Leth> esp with the DNA testing thing
<Agent_Orange> Self-Defense skills test?
<Agent_Orange> throw you in a room with a ninja and say, "see one of you in the coffee shop in 15"?
<Leth> Yeah, AGT....the Human Resources Gauntlet
<tieboy> defend yourself against the skilled Deoxyribonucleic Acid Examiners
<Agent_Orange> Digital Dirtsnake Disimpaction Screen
<Agent_Orange> Damn! they were recruiting at LSU and I missed it!
<Elkman> The dirtsnakes were?
<SeanQ> Level II Honkers Wanted!
<Agent_Orange> The Secret Datadyne Spy Co.
<Elkman> "No experience necessary."
<Agent_Orange> DATADYNE is a globally focused company that seeks competitive advantage in high quality, reliable solutions for technology-based challenges. As a company, we share skills and resources among business units to optimize performance.
<Agent_Orange> Are we all clear on that?
<Mr-Ben> Sure, whatever you say.
<mdxi> hey, they're at GSU today!
<Elkman> Yeah. But what do they do?
<SeanQ> translation: "We surf the net all day."
<tieboy> Yes. "We are good at writing sentences that are long but mean nothing."
<mdxi> damn, i wish i knew someone there
<mdxi> i should call them and ask where the datadyne recriuters are
<Agent_Orange> Ah well, the drug test would have peeled me from the herd before I got to the thunderdome to battle the HR manager, anyway
<SeanQ> ** Agent_Orange is now known as Agt_Orange_on_Crack
<Agent_Orange> Ten years ago, you could have developed film in my urine.
<kaufman> but you wouldn't want to
<hockeyfag> what company is this?
<Agent_Orange> http://datadyne.com/default.htm
<Agent_Orange> Dig that motto: "Building a Better Reality"
* hockeyfag 's company had on the applicatoin "have you ever been convicted of a felony (other than posession of less than 1 oz of marajuana)"
*** Agent_Orange is now known as Bill_Murray
<Bill_Murray> Convicted? No, neve convicted.
<Leth> http://datadyne.com/mission.htm
<hockeyfag> so what the hell do they do
<Leth> Chock Full O' Buzzwords!
<Elkman> That would explain the Easter egg that pops up whenever you try to back up a file named "marijuana.html": "Hey, dude, toke up!"
<Agent_Orange> Double secret ninja stuff.
<hockeyfag> make space stuff
<Leth> in chartreuse
<Agent_Orange> I could tell you, but then 'd have to kill you.
<Leth> our "Code of Ethics"
<Agent_Orange> Datadyne: Makers of Fine Black Helicopters Since 1945
<Leth> tieboy: You're a shoe-in there! "In addition, the Company often performs better than the minimum requirements to meet environment impact standards established by the Global Trade Alliance in 1994"
<tieboy> Yeah! Exceeding the minimum!!
<Agent_Orange> "Marginally In Accordance with the Geneva Convention since 1966!"
<tieboy> "Creating a Marginally Better Reality"
<SeanQ> "often performs better than the minimum required to stay in business"
<Elkman> What's in their "restricted" section?
<tieboy> Oh, you know there's nothing in there...
<hockeyfag> there's a paperplant up in International Falls. It straddles the US/Canada border over a river. They have pipes piping water back and forth between the sides.. in the US, its illegal to dump some chemicals, so they pipe it over to the canadian side and dump it on that side, and vice versa :) same river.. 2 sets of laws
<Leth> "Just barely made it above legal levels of airborne carcinogens!"
<Elkman> I'm thinking this web site is a joke.
<SeanQ> "seldom flirting with Chapter 11 bankruptcy since 1994"
<hockeyfag> kinda like NZ Air's slogan... "Welcome aboard. Really"
<hockeyfag> as opposed to that airline on SNL.. "Buhbye"
<mdxi> i added the jobs page to the archive
<tieboy> For a global leader such as DATADYNE, fulfilling its traditional value of good citizenship has meant reaching beyond the workplace, through corporate contributions and mandatory employee involvement, to improve our communities.
<tieboy> Mandatory employee involvement
<Leth> "You Vill Help Der Little Kiddiez! Und You Vill Like It!"
<SeanQ> i/o/w, they do payroll deductions for United Way
<tieboy> Just last week, our trained ninjas repainted the kids rec center
<Agent_Orange> "Sure, we'll send a few worker drones over to help with thepony rides!"
<kaufman> Here are some of the most common positions within our organization:
<Leth> Squatting.
<Leth> Sitting.
<kaufman> Missionary
<shil> lying flat on their back
<shil> face down
<SeanQ> Slumped over a desk unconscious
<Agent_Orange> Stuffed in a car trunk
<mdxi> i hear they had a problem last year when some assasin droids cleaning up their adopted highway went awry and killed 293 people
<Agent_Orange> reposing in fifteen separate mason jars
<Leth> Hiding In Shadows With A Bonus Modifier
<Agent_Orange> Neural-Nanite Ethics Scan
<mdxi> +1 for careful aim, +2 for lowlight scope, +1 for neural stabilizer mods
<Leth> Penal Bee Implant Surgery
<Leth> Datadyne CEO: Ernst Stavros Blofeld