Take A Bite Outta Braiiiiiinnnnsszzzshhszz


<sol-D> heh.. A tombstone fell on a third-grader and killed him during a field trip to a cemetery.
<spinn> "heh"?
<sol-D> I thought it was humorous. I'm a sick bastard
<spinn> maybe a full description of the cranial damage would've gotten a "hahah"
<Machival> hahaha...
* SoiledGreen is a sick bastard also.
* Machival jumps on the sick bastard bandwagon.
<sol-D> just a skull fracture. he shouldn't have been hanging off of the tombstone like that
<Machival> how big of a fucking tombstone was this?
<SeanQ> boy, only a skull fracture? they don't make third graders like they used to
<sol-D> 5 foot or so.
<SeanQ> back in my day you could run over a third-grader with a Pinto and they'd jump up and refuse to eat their vegetables
<zompist> i wonder if the parents will sue the dead dude
<SoiledGreen> <little kid> that's one BIG FUCKING TOMBSTONE!
<Machival> <little kid> wonder what will happen if I pull it down on my head?
<spinn> yeah, when I was a young'un we had small pockets of nitroglycerin implanted directly in our skulls
<zompist> tombstones will now come with warning labels
<zompist> and wtf sort of a field trip is going to a cemetary?
<sol-D> a spooooooooky one
<KemloCaesar> "Here lies..... YOU, unless you back off now!"
<spinn> "JOHN A. HALMIN. 1921 - 2001. Dearest Father And Friend. Do Not Play On Or Around."
<SoiledGreen> Gothic Kids Of America.
<SeanQ> "Think it's fun climbing on top of a tombstone? Try laying underneath one." This message brought to you by the Ad Council
<Elkman> "Want to play around in a cemetery? You could be making a grave mistake."
<sol-D> 'This Gravestone Is Not a Toy. Keep away from children. Choking Hazard."
<zompist> lunch, which was eaten blindfolded, was peeled grape eyes, cold macaroni guts, and whittled carrot bones
<spinn> that's for the PSA posters
<hockeyfag> "Don't stay out too late at a cemetery. you could get a cold and start coffin."
<Machival> they'll come up with a new spokesperson for the PSA's.
<SeanQ> Nancy Reagan
<Machival> "Craig the Corpse"
<SeanQ> she can have "Just Say No" engraved on Ronnie's headstone
<zompist> McDeath the Cemetary Dog
<sol-D> dogs and cemetaries don't mix too well
<Elkman> "Help take a bite out of grave robbing."
<spinn> Take A Bite Outta Braiiiiiinnnnsszzzshhszzh
<Machival> true, though, what kind of field trip is that anyway?
<KemloCaesar> archaeological?
<tieboy> "You're fresh from the womb, don't go straight to the tomb."
<spinn> better than a meat processing plant, I suppose
<Machival> "Now... over here is John Wilson. Do you know what John Wilson died of? Cooties."
<Elkman> "Here's where you little crackheads could end up if you keep sniffing glue!"
<SoiledGreen> *** Elkman is now known as Agent_Orange
<Elkman> "YES, that includes Elmer's!"
<Machival> "See this one? Only 7 years old when he died. He probably pissed off his teacher..."
<spinn> see, now if you people would be bothered to watch invader zim, I'd have a joke here
<spinn> but nooooo
<zompist> i was just reading about a class that was taken to a slaughterhouse.
<zompist> as spectators, i mean.
<Machival> awww... just spectators?
<Elkman> Mmmm... veal.
<Machival> "Any volunteers for the sausage machine?"
<Machival> "No? Then I'll just have to call on someone. Billy."
<sol-D> they took my kindergarten class on a hay wagon ride once. it crashed...
<sol-D> but my mom didn't let me go, so I was ok at least
<Machival> we just had lame-ass field trips... like... to 'behind the school' and stuff.
<Machival> we went to a mine once, though. that was pretty neat.
<Kyol> "Here's where the older kids go to smoke between classes"?
<hockeyfag> There's a school here in St Paul. They're called the St Paul Packers because of all the slaughter houses and such. Their hockey jerseys are white, like the aprons the butchers wear, and a steer head on it, blood red in color.
<Elkman> That makes me really glad I grew up on this side of the river.
<jacquilyn> We had field trips to like the grocery store and stuff.
<jacquilyn> Oh, and we had one field trip to the post office, which was pretty damned enthralling, let me tell you, because my mother ran the post office (it was a small town, one person operation) and I spent most of my summers there.
<Machival> and I on this side of the border.
<hockeyfag> elk: yeah.. but the guys there are always real big.. all their fathers are slaughter house workrs... "big.. like bull."
<KemloCaesar> we had a field trip to a bank.
<Machival> "But don't you cut bulls up, daddy?"
<KemloCaesar> "don't the bulls get their balls cut off?"
<Elkman> Kemlo: Why would there be bulls in a bank?
<zompist> we had a field trip to the lifeless surface of pluto
<sol-D> any fun?
<zompist> well, not really, but that's more exciting than the museums and concerts and stuff
<Machival> I once took a field trip to a magical field where animals could talk and I could move things with my mind...
<Machival> no... wait... that was an ACID trip.
<KemloCaesar> elk - because it would have been too dangerous to show us the bears
<Elkman> :D
<Samwise> zomp: the bus ride must have been hell.
<Samwise> Er, must have sucked.
<zompist> sam: yeah, especially singing "100,000 bottles of beer on the wall"
<sol-D> take one down, in space it makes no sound... 99,999 bottles of beer on the wall
<sol-D> sorry

Heather Garvey / Raven / raven@xnet.com
I want to submit a log!