It Might Be Butter, It Might Not, It's A Chance You Have To Take
<Lore> Can you believe it's not butter?
<dogmatix> i can't believe it's not jesus.
<Gayo> I Can Believe It's Butter
<DML> I Can't Believe It's Not Him
<Lore> I can't believe butter isn't Jesus.
<DML> You know, Him
<dogmatix> well, everything comes from the lord.
<Lore> I can't believe the servive around here.
<DML> I'm too afraid to say Jesus, so I just go about saying Him like it's an in-joke nobody gets
<Lore> Except bowling balls. Brunswick makes those.
<dogmatix> jesus is the lard
<Lore> I just think of the Powerpuff Girls.
<Elkman> But Jesus made Brunswick.
<Lore> Nice one, dogmatix.
<dogmatix> but you always think of those anyway.
<DML> No, Lore, He makes those.
<Lore> Actually, Colette kind of looks like an adult Buttercup to me.
<Lore> But that's probably just me.
<Lore> I am probably me.
<dogmatix> you've lost me.
<Lore> Unless I've been replaced by a doppelganger.
<Samwise> You like Buttercup?
<Elkman> WARNING: LORE-LIKE TYPING DETECTED
<Lore> Which is what you get when a ganger runs by you while honking.
<Samwise> Blossom is the best PPG.
<Lore> Plural: gangrene.
<ristoril> I can't believe it's not
<dogmatix> the ganger experiences red shift
<Gayo> I Can't Believe It's Not Incredulity
<Lore> Hehehe Gayo.
<Gayo> I Refuse To Believe It's Not Butter
<Lore> I always get red shift and red tide mixed up.
<Elkman> Doubting Thomas Butter.
<Lore> Or I used to, until I learned the following mnemonic: "They're totally different, fuckhead."
<Elkman> (The package has holes in it and a place where you can stick your hand in.)
<dogmatix> red tide is for cleaning your clothes
<dogmatix> red shift is for changing the case of letters on your keyboard
<dogmatix> except in red, of course.
<dogmatix> No Matter How Much You Try, No Matter How Many Times You Ask
* Me To, I Will Not Believe It's Butter In My Lifetime
<Lore> It Can't Believe It's Not Butter brand personal lubricant.
<Elkman> "Have this tract. Blessed are those who have not seen, but
* believe that it's butter."
<raven> LA LA LA I CAN'T HEAR YOU IT *IS* BUTTER!
<DML> If it's not Him, then it IS butter
<jacquilyn> You must have faith that it is butter.
<jacquilyn> It is your belief that makes it butter.
<raven> You Can't Make Me Believe It's Butter, You're Not The Boss Of Me
<dogmatix> the jack chick i can't believe it's not butter tract. "Hey, man, believing that it's butter is for squares. Haw, haw!" "Forget your family, they're not with it enough to know about butter."
<Lore> Occam's Razor Would Indicate That It Is Not Butter
<loot> oh boy...what did I just walk into?
<loot> theological butter discussion?
<dogmatix> I'm Much Too Drunk To Determine Whether or Not This Substance is Butter
<DML> There Is No Butter, There Is No Spread Higher Than The Self
<Lore> James Randi Will Pay You One Million Dollars To Prove It's Not Butter
<loot> Who Cares If It's Butter?
<Lore> There Is A Nonzero Chance of It Being Butter
<DML> Butter Is The Opiate Of The Masses
<loot> I thought that was heroin?
<raven> It Could Be Butter But We All Know You're Too Damn Cheap To Buy The Good Stuff
<DML> No, that's just the opiate of high fashion and pimps
<dogmatix> How Am I Supposed To Know If This Is Butter Or Not If I Did Not Make It Myself
<Lore> I Can't Believe It's Not Sarin
<raven> AAAAGHHH! Arteries...Clanging...Shut!...Must...Be...Butt-ACK!"
<ristoril> I have EXORCISED the Butter from this Spread!
<jacquilyn> Butter is the root of all evil.
<loot> Butter is the square root of 467
<Gayo> It Is Butter
<DML> All Is Butter
<dogmatix> I Can't Believe You Expect Me To Consume This
<jacquilyn> It bloody well is not.
<Humbreto> Butter is a lover, not a fighter.
<loot> jacq: what can I say, American school systems...
<raven> No, Really, Would We Lie To You? It's Butter, Dammit!
<jacquilyn> My butter is a vengeful butter.
<dogmatix> It Might Be Butter, It Might Not, It's A Chance You Have To Take
<DML> Oooh, raven, good one... Foucaldian butter
<Lore> "I mean, negative capability, that is when man is capable of being in uncertainties, mysteries, doubts, without any irritable reaching after whether it's not butter." -- John Keats
<Humbreto> Could it be half butter?
<TMR> Scroedinger's Butter
<DML> Butter Perpetuates Itself Through The Franchising of Cream
<Gayo> Until Measured, It Exists In A State Between Both Butter And Not Butter
<Gayo> Damn, TMR beat me
<DML> No, that's good
<raven> The Butter That Is Named Is Not The True Butter
<ristoril> all beatings are good
<Lore> *Will probably not be butter
<DML> Butter Has No Culture, But It Does Have Wonderful Teeth
<dogmatix> would be pretty funny if you bought a container of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter and brought it home and it was filled with lead filings. all they told you, after all, was that what you were purchasing wasn't butter.
<DML> Mmm... Derridian butter
<raven> And if you can't figure out that a tub of butter shouldn't weight 40 pounds....
<dogmatix> then you deserve to consume metal, yes.
<dogmatix> that is what i am implying.
<loot> but what if you had never had butter, and therefore *believed* that it was butter?
<DML> Platonic Butter Just Sucks
<Elkman> Would you believe they make butter sculptures at the Minnesota State Fair?
<dogmatix> in that case, you would try the lead filings, not like them and never purchase butter again. it would be a service.
<ristoril> loot: what if that has ALREADY happened!!?!?!
<ristoril> I mean, the government could have been slowly replacing butter with not-butter
<loot> what if what I'm eating RIGHT NOW is not butter???
<ristoril> and we WOULDN'T KNOW
<dogmatix> I Can't Believe It's Not Government
<raven> What if they were deliciously spreadable lead filings, though?
<Lore> I Can't Believe It's Not Athena
<loot> I Can't Believe It's Not a Conspiracy
<dogmatix> I Can't Believe Anything Anymore Damn You
<Gayo> The new robot manservant, I Can't Believe It's Not Butler.,
<dogmatix> I Can't Believe It's Not Hitler
<DML> dogmatix: Cool. Libertarian butter
<TMR> I Can't Believe It's Not Poop! (for dogs)
<Lore> "YOu take the blue pill and the story ends. You wake in your bed and you believe it's butter."
<DML> TMR: Horsehockey butter
<DML> Resident Butter Construct
<Lore> "You take the red pill and you stay in the freezer section and I show you how deep the butter-hole goes."
<loot> I Can't Believe I'm Talking About Butter Instead of Looking For a Job
<Lore> That was all just an excuse to use the phrase "butter-hole."
<dogmatix> i could have lived an entirely happy day without having been confronted by the word butter-hole
<DML> Fields... Enormous Fields... Where Butter is No Longer Churned But GROWN...
<Lore> I Can't Believe It's Not People
<Elkman> I Can't Believe It's Still Going. I mean, "Butter".
<DML> I can't Believe It's Not Soylent
<TMR> I liked the butter-hole scene in Last Tango in Paris
<Lore> The I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Battle Book
<dogmatix> i was just walking along, chatting it up and doing what i do, singing, happily, everything was fine, then i turned the Lore Corner and there it was: butter-hole.
<Humbreto> Soylent Yellow is made from butter!
<loot> butter - man's first currency
<Gayo> Soylent Green is made from genetically modified corn products!
<DML> (cue to Haydn)
<dogmatix> Butter: One Man's Story
<DML> That's what Tim Burton should have remade. Soylent Green.
<Elkman> Butter-Hole Surfers?
<DML> Planet of the Apes can wait
<Gayo> Oh yeah, definitely.
<Lore> I Can't Believe It Wasn't Squeezed Out Of A Cow's Tit By A Mechanical Tit-Sucking Machine Somewhere in Kansas
<dogmatix> only if charleton heston is the first person to be made into soylent green
<DML> I want Heston to be the old man.
<dogmatix> laugh. in the happy-death-box
<DML> And it should take place in Los Angeles
<Gayo> You can have my socially relevent dystopian future when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.
<dogmatix> ooh, it all looks so nice, ooh, nature, ah, i can feel myself being spread on a triscuit already
<DML> But, like, social protest is hip again
<Lore> I Can't Believe They're Not Dairy Futures
<DML> And what are they protesting? Corporations that make modified foods
<Gayo> I Can't Believe It's Not Curdled Bodily Fluids
Heather Garvey / Raven / email@example.com I want to submit a log!